I know this might be seen as abnormal, it's definitely not business as usual. One thing I regret; there's few work places that provide heart-to-heart time. This is one thing I only alluded to in my 'How the Why' blog post last week. However, it doesn't make it any less of a fundamental part of how I want to leave this world better than I found it, and how I provide value to those I work with.
Heart-to-heart time requires living a simple enough lifestyle that we can always drop the task at hand in order to hear one another out. For myself, I'll be the first to admit, I can be small-minded a lot of the time when I don't seek out people further on their journey who have earned my trust. For instance, just last week I was mentally accusing someone of cutting corners, when realistically, no hazard was created. For all I know, they just have higher value commitments somewhere else.
It was only because I had a safe person to confide in that I was challenged to look and see the judgment I was making. I want to create more spaces that test my capacity, since I have this solid proving-grounds for what heart-to-heart relationships really look like. As far as Community Machinery, there's a few tangible steps you can keep me accountable to upholding;
being honest and open about what we want from our relationship, and our shared future
greeting and sharing gratitude with everyone I work with,
making lunch hour and breaks a time for building connection with others,
watching who people resonate with the most, and what they're into
stepping further outside of our comfort zone on days where we feel more energetic.
Thinking about this is a leap from how I grew up. While I didn't always get the direction I really needed, the community I grew up in taught me enough to make the changes they weren't prepared to.
In my formative years, most feedback came when someone would share what had been said about me, or by overhearing someone vent, or sensing actions were passive-agressive. I learned all those things, and now I'm really making an effort to let them go in favor of starting dialogues in unlikely places.
Saying that, this is done in a respectful way. It's similar to traditional aunt and uncle roles; After earning trust, they are watching and relaying information between parents and children in the teenage years, since teens creating their own identities aren't going to be receptive to their parents. Parents also have the hardest time accepting their way might not be best for their kids.
It doesn't matter what we call this role, it could be liaison, intermediary, go-between, accountability person. What really counts is starting these relationships before a conflict arises. It's also important to have really deep common connections before taking on commitments where the stakes are high.
When conflict arises, my overseeing role with Community Machinery doesn't mean I need to make everything better overnight, it's a matter of starting the vulnerable step of saying; 'hey, what can I do to make it up to you?', and committing to that conversation until a common path, or new resources come into the picture. One thing I do know, this isn't business as usual, this is about creating a way of life in an unlikely place.